Ah I'm back..... damn..... I just realized that I made a really big mistake..... I should blame myself for everything.... sure she had her faults but mine was bigger.... I was so selfish & self-centered....... I shouldn't have done that to her..... I'm so stupid giving a girl like her so much embarrassment.... I know I couldn't do anything now but I wish I still had another chance to redeem myself..... but as the saying goes "suntok na sa buwan yan"..... I feel so helpless.... I just couldn't move on.... now that I realized I myself had to be blamed for what happened..... I don't know if I still love her, but if that's the case, I'm a big loser.... I don't deserve someone like her...... she's such a perfect girl.... and now I couldn't even say hi..... now I know I deserve everything she told me... I'm that stupid.....